Thepoorhusband"Youcan'timaginehowdifficultitisformetodealwithmywife,"themancomplainedtohisfriend."Sheasksmeaquestion,thenanswersitherself,andafterthatsheexplainedtomeforhalfanhourwhymyansweriswrong.可怜的丈夫“你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难，”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说，“她问我一个问题，然后自己回答了，过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。”Whereisthefather?Twobrotherswerelookingatsomebeautifulpaintings."Look,"saidtheelderbrother."Hownicethesepaintingsare!""Yes,"saidtheyounger,"butinallthesepaintingsthereisonlythemotherandthechildren.Whereisthefather?"Theelderbrotherthoughtforamomentandthenexplained,"Obviouslyhewaspaintingthepictures."父亲在哪儿？兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。“看，”哥哥说，“这些画多漂亮呀！”“是啊，”弟弟说道，“可是在所有这些画中，只有妈妈和孩子。那爸爸去哪儿了呢？”哥哥想了会儿，然后解释道：“很明显，他当时正在画这些画呗。”Doesthedogknowtheproverb,too?Thelittleboydidnotlikethelookofthebarkingdog."It'sallright,"saidagentleman,"don'tbeafraid.Don'tyouknowtheproverb:Barkingdogsdon'tbite?""Ah,yes,"answeredthelittleboy."Iknowtheproverb,butdoesthedogknowtheproverb,too?"狗也知道这个谚语吗？一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：‘吠狗不咬人。’”“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”一Canwehaveourteacherback？Onceasuperintendentofschoolswasvisitingathree-roomschool.Oneroomwasverynoisy,sothemangrabbedatallboywhohadbeenstandinguptalking.Hetooktheboyintoanotherroomandstoodhiminthecorner.Fiveminuteslater,asmallboycameoutofthefirstroomandsaid,"Whencanwehaveourteacherback?"能让我们的老师回去吗？有一次，一位督学去视察一个只有三间教室的学校。一间教室非常吵闹，因此督学抓住其中一个正在站着说话的人，把他带进另一间教室，并让他站在墙角。五分钟以后，一个小男孩从第一间教室走进来，问道，“您什么时候能让我们的老师回去呢？”Who'sMorePolite?Afatmanandaskinnymanwerearguingaboutwhowasthemorepolite.Theskinnymansaidhewasmorepolitebecausehealwaystippedhishattoladies.Butthefatmanknewhewasmorecourteousbecause,wheneverhegotupandofferedhisseat,twoladiescouldsitdown.谁更有礼貌？一个胖子和一个瘦子在争论谁更有礼貌。瘦子说他更有礼貌，因为他经常对女士摘帽示意。但是胖子认为他更有风度，因为无论什么时候他在车上给别人让座时，总有两位女士能坐下。ExpensivePriceDentist:I'msorry,madam,butI'llhavetochargeyoutwenty-fivedollarsforpullingyourson'stooth.Mother:Twenty-fivedollars!ButIthoughtyouonlychargedfivedollarsforanextraction.Dentist:Iusuallydo.Butyoursonyelledsolo